Tips for Moving on After a Breakup

The post is developed in partnership with BetterHelp.

Breakups are very often challenging, and the thought of picking yourself back up and moving on from your ex can sometimes be overwhelming. It’s okay to find the process difficult and to allow yourself the time you need to recover.

While there is no sure-fire way to make a breakup easy, there are a few steps you can take to lessen the burden. This article will look at a few common tips that may be helpful if you’re recovering from a challenging breakup.

Acknowledge Your Feelings

Perhaps the most useful advice for most when it comes to a breakup is this: allow yourself to experience the feelings related to your relationship ending, but don’t act on them immediately. Allowing yourself to experience your feelings is a form of self-respect and an important component of mindfulness.

Taking time to acknowledge your feelings without trying to take steps to correct them can help you avoid making poor choices that harm your well-being in the long term. After a few days or weeks, it is likely that your emotions will feel much more manageable than if you tried to avoid them.

Focus on Self-Care

Self-care can mean different things to different people, but generally speaking, it refers to behaviors that support mental and physical health and bolster overall well-being. While there are many forms of self-care, some are considered more beneficial than others. When first building a self-care routine, many experts recommend focusing on the “Big Three” of self-care:

• Getting enough sleep is vital for mental and physical well-being. It is especially important when dealing with high levels of stress, such as what you might experience during a breakup.
• Stressful events can cause significant chances in appetite and eating habits. It is important to remember to consume at least the minimum number of calories you require per day, ideally as part of a nutritious, balanced diet.
• Of all forms of self-care, regular physical activity may have the most significant effect on mental well-being. Exercise has both long- and short-term benefits, meaning a workout can help you feel better immediately, and a workout routine sustained over time can help improve mood and resilience to stress.

Leverage Your Support System

It can be tempting to isolate yourself during difficult times like a breakup. You may not feel comfortable displaying emotion around others or focusing on the details of the breakup. Even if you don’t want to talk about your past relationship, consider reaching out to supportive friends and family.

Positive social interaction alone significantly bolsters well-being and lowers stress. If you’re comfortable, feel free to seek support, but merely spending time with those who care about you is likely to be beneficial.

Set Appropriate Boundaries with Your Ex

It may be tempting to talk to your ex to find closure or explore details surrounding your past relationship. While that may be helpful in time, consider waiting until your emotions have stabilized before dissecting your past relationship. Similarly, it is likely a good decision to tell your ex that you won’t be available to talk about your relationship for a while.

Taking time to heal is important, not only because it may prevent you from reentering an unhealthy relationship but also because spending too much time considering the details of the relationship may make your emotions more intense.

For more information about how to talk to your ex after a breakup, check out this article from BetterHelp, a mental health resource and therapy provider (http://www.betterhelp.com/advice/relations/how-to-talk-to-your-ex-after-its-over/).

Focus on You

One tried-and-true way to help yourself move past a partner is to shift your focus to yourself. Now is a great time to find new hobbies, make new friends, explore new places, or do the things you couldn’t do in your relationship.

Engaging in your hobbies and interests not only helps distract you from challenging circumstances but also directly enhances your mental and emotional well-being. Now is a great time for you to prioritize your wants and needs.

Rediscover Your Identity

A breakup can significantly impact how you see yourself. You may have defined yourself in terms of your relationship, and now that it has ended, you might feel a bit lost. It’s a great time to rediscover who you are outside of your previous partnership.

Reflect on your personal values, goals, and interests that you may have neglected. This process can be incredibly empowering as it allows you to redefine your identity and make decisions that are truly aligned with your authentic self. Consider writing in a journal or creating a vision board to visually plot out your aspirations and plans moving forward.

Create a Routine for Stability

During the emotional turmoil following a breakup, establishing a daily routine can provide a sense of stability and normalcy. Routine helps reduce anxiety by adding predictable structure to your day, which can be comforting when your emotional world feels chaotic.

Start with simple activities like setting consistent meal times, regular sleep schedules, and dedicated periods for work or study. As you grow more comfortable, integrate more personalized activities such as morning walks, reading before bed, or weekly social outings. This structured approach helps in creating a balance, ensuring that your days are not entirely consumed by thoughts of the breakup.

Engage in Reflective Practices

Engaging in reflective practices such as meditation, mindfulness, or even therapy can provide profound insights into your personal growth journey post-breakup. Meditation can help calm your mind and center your thoughts, allowing you to deal with emotions more constructively.

Mindfulness encourages you to live in the moment and appreciate life as it is, without dwelling on past regrets or future anxieties. Therapy, whether it’s traditional counseling or online sessions, can offer professional guidance to navigate your feelings and start building a healthier emotional future. These reflective practices can significantly aid in understanding and processing your emotions more deeply.

As long as you choose healthy coping strategies, you will likely find yourself improving over time. In contrast, unhealthy coping strategies, like substance use, might make the healing process significantly harder. In all the decisions you make next, remember to prioritize your well-being and avoid common poor-coping pitfalls like drugs, alcohol, or jumping straight into a new relationship.